Adela: 0:07

Hello everyone, welcome to the Artist Within Podcast. My name is Adela Hitel, I am your host, and this podcast is produced by Fink, a New Way to Think, project Human. Our whole goal and mission is to change your perspective about the way you view your life, you view yourself and how you function, and recognize that within you and who you are. You have the power to do it, and so if you're not following, supporting and doing that, you guys can head out to our website, which is literally right down here underneath our little logo tag. Head on to that, you'll also find our, the podcast itself and all the other good stuff, and there's a couple more pieces of information for you guys to check out.

Adela: 0:46

A couple of things that I want to mention out to you today. This is our 17th or 18th episode. I'm not really sure at this moment anymore. My brain is fried, but we are almost to the end of the season. First of all, I can't believe I had it in me to do it, because I've been procrastinating on this for like ever in a day, but I did it and I'm doing it and we're doing it. It just takes some time to again define your narrative, know what you want to do, know how you want it, and that may take a little bit longer, and you may need to fine tune a few things and you may need to redo it over and over and over again, and one day I will do an episode of where I show you the behind the scenes of me working on this over the last couple of years, and let me tell you, okay, the amount of behind the scenes that is on this is insane. It's just like there constantly, and the amount of trials and errors that I've done is insane. So it's all there, though. It's there. But so the other thing I wanted to add on to you and let you know that on October 19th, we're participating in the NAMI Walk. So if you are going to be doing there being there, sign up with us, come walk with us.

Adela: 1:54

For us and for NAMI, it's a day of celebration for mental health. We'll be there. We're going to be talking about mental health, we're going to be encouraging you to join our mission, to support us and to share our own testimonies of how we walked our path, in our own trials and errors, and how we've gotten to where we're at, and, again, all the things we're building and we're so excited for the next year, and last night we just got off our team meeting with our Project Cuban team who's been working in the back end, and some of the things we've got planned going on the backbone, stuff that we've been working on that we haven't shown anybody yet is really exciting and I can't wait, wait, wait, wait to do that. But again, we're in the progress, we're doing it, we're getting there. So that's October 19th.

Adela: 2:34

Follow us, be there, show up. It starts at 9 am, registration starts at 8 am, but the walk starts at am at the ymca and, uh, it's a 5k. So come prepared with some water, with some stuff, and come join us, come celebrate. We would love to love to have you come visit our tent. We would absolutely love to have you there because, well, we're awesome, we're project human and we're awesome.

Adela: 2:55

So that's that and uh, also, thank you for listening to the artist within podcast and thank you for being a part of everything that we've had to do where we're at, because we are over 220 downloads, we are in three countries, which is insane, and we're looking to expand because why not? That's our new motto for right now, not our new motto, obviously. It's been a motto for everybody all the time, why not? But like we're really embracing that, why not? And our small wins? Uh, every small step that we do and keep moving forward is a win for us and we're so, so, so excited to even be here. So, thank you for your support, thank you for the downloads, thank you for the follows, the likes and the whole nine yards of it. Continue to do it, continue to push it, continue to support us. Uh, we again. There's a team that's coming and it's going to be up front to share with you some of the things we've been working on. It's not just me, it's not just Adela, but there is a team of people who have helped make Adela be a bit more better and have helped make Project Human what it is and helped ensure that the message, the narrative of who we are, what we want to do, is there. So that's my little shout outs, my little tidbits, and thank you for everybody who supported us again, to the businesses, to the small artists, everybody who's come onto the podcast so far, everybody who shared it literally to even make this happen. We really, really, really, really appreciate you. I really appreciate you.

Adela: 4:21

I wanted to just give you a quick announcement for next week's episode, because this one might be my most entertaining one of all, because the the I met a human being, his name is devin clemens, and I met him, um, through the parachute goddess project and, and the reason I'm bringing this up is because I'm really excited to share with you just because I learned something new. And when I learned something new, like how people perceive me when they first meet me, it's insane, and this perception was just insane, like it makes me laugh at what it was. So tune in, next week, next Tuesday, we'll be dropping that episode with him and I'm learning about semi-pro wrestling, like it's. It's really interesting, so that's cool. So, anyway, there's that. There's all my up up to date, up to bits right now. Thank you guys, I appreciate you.

Adela: 5:15

Uh, today I'm doing a little bit this, a little bit different. I want to take the last 10 uh episode, 11 episodes that we have left, and I want to do them in a way that is going to continue the conversation and continue keeping the conversation going. It's part of one of our initiatives that we have monthly continued conversations and that will be really coming back on this month to at the end of the month. So look out for that on our YouTube channel. If you're not following our Project Human channel, we are not not subscribed, please do? We have 121 subscribers for our little old selves, thank you. Let's keep them rising up. Let's get to 200. That would be fantastic, and we are working to bring our monthly continued conversations back.

Adela: 5:58

So part of our initiative is within, the artist within is to continue conversations about mental health, and one of the things about this podcast that I want to do is I want it to be a continued platform where we revisit conversations, where we revisit topics or we continue conversations and continue with certain people or more people or whoever, but sharing stories and telling stories in a co-hosty kind of way. So I would like to introduce you for our first season ever of the season one, resilience, our little, our co-host for today is going to be Claire Louise Hooter. I'm so excited to have her back and I'm just. She has made played a major role. I've mentioned it on our last podcast and talked about her, but she's made a played a major role in helping me really define what I want Project Human to be within the program itself, what I want it to be as a reflection back on the human themselves, and so she's been in and out and she's been on our team for a year now in the back end on our meetings and kind of seeing what everything's going. And so she'll be coming out on our meeting at the end of the month to really talk about her experience through that.

Adela: 7:02

But today I wanted to have somebody on just so we have a normal conversation where I don't have necessarily a topic and it's off the cuff because there's so much happening. There's hurricanes upon hurricanes, and those of you who are listening today, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, stay safe during Hurricane Milton. Right now, it is absolutely imperative that you follow instructions and whatever people are telling you, get out, get out, do your thing, stay safe and then reach out when you are it's you know. I don't know how it's going to be for us. We're up north, we're in Jacksonville, we've been very lucky and fortunate and blessed and I've had a protective shield over us. So I continue to pray that's going to happen.

Adela: 7:41

However, we never know. But I do know that this is something for our South friends that we should all be concerned about and praying. So please, please, stay safe and take the precautions and then absolutely, because you're still devastated from Helene. Just know that again, there's a lot of things that are happening and we as a state and as a community are going to have to come together after this to help ourselves. We have many neighboring states that are suffering through a lot of this. So I just want to pinpoint that and that's kind of why I wanted today's conversation in today's episode, because it's being released actually today. All of this is happening today, tuesday October 8th.

Adela: 8:15

Oh and happy birthday to my sister. Shout out to Ivana Happy birthday. But all this happening, so I wanted to invite a co-host and Claire was available to come on and talk with us and just share again this conversation. So I've taken enough time, Claire, welcome back.

Adela: 8:31

Take a second Take a second to say hi and, just you know, give your two cents of have you been since we last talked and, you know, catch us up on a few things that you've got going on, and then we'll get into just topics of the day, I guess.

Claire: 8:47

Yes, of course, hi, it is so great to be back. Thank you for having me. Goodness, how long has it been it's definitely been a couple to a few months since my episode's been out. It's been pretty good. Since then, life's been life. It's been a little bit of a roller coaster, of course, but been just hanging in there and doing some real projects still working on video call um that we were talking about last time. My uh little domestic violence and and awareness short film. Uh, still working on that with jack, who has come back down to florida so we can get even more one-on-one time together to actually get it how we want it to be, which not to interrupt you on that, but can we just, can I get, can we get like an introduction with jack, with me and jack?

Adela: 9:35

I think I met him once, maybe, maybe in passing, but like you know, I've heard about this famous jack. Right now I've heard about this jack.

Claire: 9:41

Yeah, I've heard about this great jack jack. Yeah, I've heard about this great Jack.

Adela: 9:44

Jack Drain that you know it'd be nice, nice one day. So anyway, I digress Just that out there.

Claire: 9:52

So that is really exciting. I'm excited for that to come out. I'm planning on hopefully having that done by the end of the year. And then I've been focusing on October. It's um, and then I've been focusing on october. It's, unashamedly, my birthday month, so I've been wanting to celebrate. You know, a lot this month. It's a golden birthday for me if anybody celebrates golden birthdays when you turn the year of the day you were born big in my family. But um, so I've been doing some fun shoots and setting up even more filming opportunities, some fun stuff, more horror shorts coming out later this month.

Adela: 10:31

Oh, that's exciting. Lots of moving parts as always that's exciting.

Adela: 10:35

Well, just an FYI you look really good, you're doing really good and I just love seeing you again thrive and be vibrant and all of this stuff, because again you and I go back into a lot of ways where I wasn't even thriving in some way, you weren't in some way, and then the way we worked and where we're at it's, it's just so cool to see that progression, to be there. So again, congratulations and thanks for co-hosting with me today. So you, let's talk about the podcast. So far, so, like, let's talk about this whole, this whole experience and like, um, I've talked about it for I don't know years now Like, hey, I'm going to start a podcast, I'm going to talk to people and in some ways I did try to through our like in the past and doing them on YouTube and doing a couple of videos here and there via zoom calls and just these things.

Adela: 11:23

These are all tests in the waters, but it was never like here we are, mic in hand, I'm producing, I'm clicking the buttons, I've got softwares and systems and holy crap, and we're here. And then you know, we've had, you've kind of had the experience of being a part of that and all that stuff. And so tell me what's been, what's been a huge, what's been a huge benefit. But what's been a good benefit that's come out of our progress this last year of like, hey, we're going to do the Artist Within Podcast, here's what we're going to do, and we had our meeting last night too about where we're on our metrics, how we're putting kind of things together. But, like, we've gotten some good reviews on people saying that, hey, we are, we're inspiring people. This is a good platform to start having.

Adela: 12:08

Um, I actually just haven't had a chance to respond yet, but miss dana michelle made a huge awesome post about the podcast and about us and even said that we have potential for something, for some big stuff, which was such a huge honor. So just to hear kind of that feedback, how, what's been your experience and again, just being part of Project Human, part of all of this, but what's been Claire's experience and what's your thought on the podcast? I'm curious because you're in the back end, you know. So, like you guys know, and I like getting people's feedbacks that are, that's more personal. I appreciate everyone else's, I do, I really really, really do. But getting personally told some things so I can learn, I'm always for it.

Claire: 12:53

Well, excuse me, well, the podcast.

Claire: 13:00

First of all, congratulations on getting it out and everything with everybody keeping it going with all these ideas, even with getting this episode. I love how you're just keeping it with it and that's one thing that with the podcast I've noticed is we've kind of you and we all have kind of like gone on of an upward curve almost coming on the end of the of this year and, as you've said, we've gotten great reception. It's been real nice to get I've gotten some personal messages rather than some people have commented, but it's been nice to get the messages saying it's nice to hear you say those things or it's nice to hear people talking about the topics that we're talking about, because it's important and a lot of people are searching for, like those mental health, that mental health knowledge, that similar experience and knowing that people are finding those similar experiences with our episodes with my episode, with the parachute goddess episode, with over, with Monique's it's really, it's really inspiring. So I'm excited to see us finish out the year on that upward, upward climb that we're doing.

Adela: 14:21

I know it's so exciting and I love that you said that, because at the end of the day, I think that's what I was saying yesterday too is one of the things I've learned. One of our strengths, one of my strengths too is and I'm something I have to again I mentioned, I have to get into now saying the word I too, that I'm part of this, not just a we thing and it's a. It's an exercise I have to work on through a coaching session. I did, you guys, I get opportunities and I take opportunities and I'm an opportunist and sometimes you get hit in the head and they're like Adela, you are great, but you could be greater, and you're like er, and so I'm again an opportunist and one of those things is seeing where I have actually put in the work and done that, and that's part of this right, part of the mental health, part of everything that we are training at Project Human we're talking through with this podcast we're doing, is the idea that I, the human being, the existence of that individuality, that independence, that power within, is capable of creating all the things that it needs and wants with the resources, even with what it has. Like we don't have the resources to do this at the level that we're doing it? We don't, but what we're doing is doing it at the level that we want, to do it with what we have and with the people we have and with just the ideas that we have, with the understanding and the knowledge that if we continue, we're going to get better, like. We just know that. And for the I part of mental health, that's I, I know and think when we're in those spaces, that's all we want as an independent being. We don't want to be clustered into. I don't want.

Adela: 15:57

If I'm going through a moment, right like we talk about when, when we're in those spaces, if I'm going through a moment, I don't want it to be well, we can all get through it. We can all know, heifer, I'm going through it Like I'm in it. I am here, see me for where I'm at, feel me for how I'm at. I try to just understand for where I'm at, and then afterwards we sure can get together and work on it and make a plan, but until I get out of it, we can't do nothing. Um, anything that was part of an individual is important because we don't. We don't think as a, as a collective, we just think that that human should be able to do whatever. Oh, my dog is trying to kill me. When my light, for like the eighth time today you guys, he's over here having a good time. He really is like for real. So a light just fell on me for those of you who are watching, a light fell on me for those of you who are listening. A light fell on me, um, but yeah, it's, it's that thing.

Adela: 16:51

And so, with creating platforms and creating spaces for us to have conversations, um, you've also come so far to like want to talk about some of your things, like some of the things that you've gone through and some of the things that have gone through, and especially be able to face them and answer.

Adela: 17:10

And again, you're doing a lot of this through the arts, through that. So you know, what do you like, what has been the greatest, what do you have like, what is the greatest change for you so far over these last couple of years that you've noticed in yourself has changed for you so far over these last couple years that you've noticed in yourself and I know I asked you that question, like in before, but this way I'm asking you for you on an individual level now, because I think even that question that I asked you before, just a couple months ago, is going to be different in an answer, because there's a difference in you. Like I feel it, I see it, and so I just how is that? And then, what question do you might have that you're like wondering about life or, you know, considering?

Claire: 17:53

well, I'd say that now I'm even more. I'm even more willing to talk about some things like, as you, as you said, my willingness to even like reach certain subjects and certain things. In my past, such as my assault. I've been a lot more willing to address that, especially because of something that happened recently in church and being. I'm seeing how me talking is affecting those around me, especially in, you know, just in the Jacksonville community, not just, you know, around me, because it's allowed me to open myself up more to the community and to others in general, but also it's given me that insight into it and I have, like that extra eye in the, in the crowd, where I can like just notice those things more and then so. So in both ways it's like the, the community is more visible and I'm more visible because I'm willing to share those things. So it's it's it's creating those next steps, both personally and professionally, and it's exciting to see it just yeah.

Adela: 19:16

So what do you? What do you like? Do you? What's your life question that you have, like as a life question? Like, what do you like as it pertains to mental health or life, or anything Like? What's your life question that you have, like it's a life question Like, what do you like as it pertains to mental health or life, or anything like what's a question that you, claire, sit and think and ponder? Or maybe a statement you have that you ponder that, since you're willing to share, that you might be willing to share, like for me.

Adela: 19:39

I say again, I am honest in this and I say this because I know everybody will be like, oh, adela, no, you're great. No, like I absolutely think I am a terrible human being. Like the thought of, like you know, like those thoughts right, like when, when, and it don't mean that like, oh, I know the difference. But because of what I've experienced in life, what I've been able to tap into, and like you can't turn that off. Once you see that side of humanity, once you've experienced that side of humanity, and once you know that you possess that side of humanity, it's hard to turn your eye away from your own being of it and having to, like, navigate that on a daily basis, regardless of all this that we're working on and building like, um, what's like, and I don't maybe you don't go as deep as I do on the, you know on that, but what's what's? Uh? Right, you know, but what's what's like, and I don't, maybe you don't go as deep as I do on the, you know on that, but what's what's? Uh? Right, you know, but what's what's? Maybe something you do.

Adela: 20:30

That might be a common thing that we as a collective might be thinking. You know, in our states of existence right now, especially with everything going on, um, that you're like man or this. And then how do you circumvent that now? Because maybe in the past you couldn't even get past that, but now you're like no, I know that that is within me, but here's how I'm going to get past it because I understand, like I know better than that. I understand better than that I'm. I have tools that are better than what my thinking is, because thinking can just go out of control control, gotcha it's.

Claire: 21:06

It's gonna sound simple, but it's not, because I'd say the question is pretty much what now? Before I couldn't really answer that question, especially when I was, you know, really struggling when you, when I first was introduced to you and to Fink. You know, really struggling when you, when I first was introduced to you and to Fink and um, I was first going through programs with you and and and all the Fink um, before I couldn't really answer that question, afraid to answer that question, even address it, um, like with my assault, I even put off reading my report for months and months and months after I got it because I was like it's not the right time, I don't want to, I don't want to address it now, I don't want to ruin my mood or but that what now? Was then stuck in limbo. So, and it's so applicable to just society too, because we're all kind of stuck in that what now? Stage. I don't want to make it political, but we're just no, but we all are.

Claire: 22:10

We're stuck in that in that stage, politically, personally, mentally, spiritually emotionally every way everybody's kind of stuck in some way in the what now, and now it's pushing through that what now? And making it uh, like, uh, now this or or just you know something more than that, and like, for instance, with me, I I just myself read my assault report. It made me a little angry, as I, as I mentioned to you, with how it was written down by the right office lots of she thinks, lots of maybes, lots of like. Thank you for taking what I say so seriously, um, but in a way it also kind of lit a fire under me that I didn't expect. So by addressing that, what now? It lights the fire. And now I want to, I want to do more in regards to, to that. I want to share more because, um, with what I mentioned earlier, with, like I, I have become more religious. I don't want to like people have their own ways to find a way, so I don't want to like push religion on anybody, but I'm Christian.

Claire: 23:32

I and I realized at church recently there was a sermon and it was pretty much realized that I have always struggled with the fact that my assaulter, my rapist, will never be identified, never punished. But he will be, but it will be, so I don't have to carry that worry. I was, I was stuck with that for so long. So instead moving past that, I can just it's like an integral moment to step forward. So just find this moment. It makes me realize. I've personally realized that I think God made me keep my eyes closed because I could have been hurt more, it could have been worse if I opened my eyes. So I truly believe that he was holding my eyes shut. So it's those little realizations. It's those little realizations and for those who don't believe in god, it could just be like another force. But I truly believe that I was being protected. So it's finding the, it's moving me past that one. Now, girl, I know now, rather than wondering, girl, what you just said.

Adela: 24:51

I remember when I just said you look lighter, there was a different reason for that, like you, look because I.

Adela: 25:00

So you guys, this is for you. This is our first time, second time talking For us. We've been. We always end up going to sleep Right For us. We've been talking for a long time now in the back end and we've been really processing a lot of stuff and I know the burden and this has has been, and I know the weight that this has been on for you to say that that weight and that burden you've given up because it was not your responsibility to carry, because that is not your responsibility to carry right the actions of others that are done upon you are not your responsibility to carry how you carry yourself afterwards and how you proceed. That's done upon you are not your responsibility to carry how you carry yourself afterwards and how you proceed. That's all on you. But you know what was done, is that? And when you said, you know, your eyes closed, you were protected.

Adela: 25:47

There was a veteran, not a veteran, maybe it was. I'm going to be confusing these videos, you guys. My brain's fried and confusing and everything. But there was a human being he may or may not have been a veteran that I saw on one of the reels, one of the tiktoks or the shorts, whatever one of the things online and he said something about where he didn't understand, like the tragedy of his life. He said that he didn't understand why things happened to him and he just could not process, like why he went through what he went through and at at this point we're talking about assault, you guys. So, for those of you who are listening, this is where we're very honest and open about it. We didn't think we're going to be talking about this at this level. We were literally coming into, like, literally coming to talk, but this is what this is about, because I can't do what. Do you call them the small talk? I'm not a small talker, as you guys know. I'm not. We talk about serious stuff in life because that's who we are as beings like. We are literally experiencing an overwhelming amount. Anyway, he said, uh, you know he was assaulted as a child and stuff happened to him, but he couldn't remember or like something he would dissociate. You know, we all use our self-defense mechanism to not be in the presence of something that's happening and it hit me so hard, just like I'm sure it hit you hard too, because you're like, oh my god, I may never know, I may never find out.

Adela: 27:04

But then the other part of lurking, and again, as I said, for those of you who listen to this part and are not religious or not into any kind, that's fine, whatever, I believe in God and I believe in what it is, so take it as you will and how you will, for you what you want, okay, but part of what I'm understanding, and again, I don't, I'm not, I don't read the Bible like that. So please and again, correct me also too, but like I'm not that way, I just have it that way, like the connection and that is there and I'm done Like it's done. So, um, but part of what he said was that you know when, when Jesus died on the Christ and he was, he took all the burdens and all the sins and he took all the beatings, all of that, uh, in my head I could see it. When you know we're going through such a tragedy and we don't remember or we dissociate or we remove, it's like that. When I talk about the veil of protection, when I talk about like I always, like I have this like shield over me, it's literally that right, you're shielded by Jesus to take the brunt of, like the worst, the worst of stuff so you may be going through things, and when you can come out on the other side of it and when you can look at life and go I because I can't believe how I can still stay look at life and say it's beautiful, right, like when people go through stuff in life. How can you look at another human being when a human being does things to you and be like humans are great, like humans are awesome, when we're literally murdering people right now, everywhere, all across the board so, and people are hurting everywhere and people are talking about which I personally don't understand.

Adela: 28:33

Somebody who survived a war and I'm going to get on my end political tangent real quick but as somebody who survived a war, I don't understand how we're in tragedy and in scenarios where, like, bureaucracy has no means, no, nothing, and people need to create systems for life or for, like sustainability or like the things happen in North Carolina, and then we have to follow some kind of paperwork trail. The paperwork doesn't even exist, like I don't understand. But you know common sense doesn't apply in a lot of stuff from what I understand. So that's my little two bits, two bits, two bits. So take it as you will cancel me, however you want it to be, I don't care.

Adela: 29:05

I'm just saying, as someone who survived it, I don't understand that process and you're not that process. Like that's the part right. Like you have to have faith and you have to be able to give that. Give away the burdens that are not yours to carry to to whatever you believe in, but give it to something so that you yourself can start to fulfill yourself and live the life that you're destined to live, and live through your potential and find your worth. Like your worth can only be found when you decide that there's a part of you that is worth giving up that burden. Right, there is a part of you that's worth saying I'm not going to carry your responsibility, I'm not going to be accountable for your actions, I don't care if you're my mother, father, brother, sister. Like that's not what that is.

Adela: 29:49

Me and God have a conversation sometimes and I'm like I don't understand, like sir hello, and then he'll put me in my place, where I belong, and then I'll understand. But I will question it. That's who we are. But if you're not willing to have those conversations, questions again. We don't get to that.

Adela: 30:05

And we've talked about these conversations how many times again in that back end of that and, like I said, to see you say that and hear you say that, and that you've given that part of that only makes me so much more excited because of the stuff that we've talked about for your future. Come on, you know what I'm talking about, so so you know it. Just it makes me so excited because these are milestones that humans are overcoming on their own and with resources. That again, I'm not saying that therapy is not working and therapy does not, and the medical resource and professionals and we're not medical professionals or resources or any of that stuff. What I'm saying is that human beings, connections, understanding, compassion and accountability, responsibility, law and order, organization, all these discipline, commitment, all these words we're so afraid of do actually work right.

Claire: 31:00

They actually work everyone just needs to find what fits them. Unfortunately it's not a cookie cutter system. But fortunately it's not a cookie cutter system because everyone's so unique, you know it. It has to tell you. You just need to it's not, it's not all you know help, you need to find it. You need to put that, that willpower to that, that effort into initially wanting to find that and it'll, it'll help you find it. As long as you want to, it'll it'll find you. But yeah, you, as long as you want to, it'll find you. But you got to want to, you got to try.

Adela: 31:38

Can you compare your? Can you tell me what your thoughts are on the comparison of yourself to today, just specifically today, this moment? And I'm putting you back into Claire when she worked at an office. Claire Back then, claire, right, that Claire way back when Claire's like give me, because I know that, like when you look at that human and it's not like oh, I don't understand that Claire, but like how much more compassion or grace do you have for that being, or where are you at with that? Like how do you? How do you process that now? Because, like, we've worked on that, but like how do you? I'm really curious, like your thoughts on it it's.

Claire: 32:23

It's kind of like I I've never been in this position, but I feel like this is what it would be like. I feel like it's like an older sister looking back on, like a younger sister who's who's struggling, there's something that she's been through and she and she like wants to help her like I. I want, I want to reach out, you know, say that it'll be okay, because you'll say all the things that you'll be like trust just Adela, she was right, stick with it, you're fine. For all those you know, all those lulls and because of course it's up and down and just looking back, I was just so much more timid. I thought I wasn't, I like I still thought it was an outgoing, you know, do whatever person, but I would constantly just shut myself down, even from, like going out to try to socialize, even even with film people. So I'm just, I've grown more. I'm the older sister now.

Adela: 33:32

I love that. It is because that's so true, like so we talk about trauma and we talk about our beings right, like where we're at right now, mentally and spiritually, what our body remembers. Our body is working to catch up to everybody else, like our mind is so fast. So the brain is so fascinating. And the brain, once you guys start learning about it and doing your thing. I should recommend, like there's a couple of books.

Adela: 33:56

I actually have one right here, habits of a Happy Brain, and it's your, retain your brain to boost your whatever. These guys, these friends, it's also Meet your Happy Chemicals. If you guys want to find it online, it's on our link on our website too, under the if you go to our books stuff too, it should be in there. If not, let me know and I'll get in there, but I'll double check it. But anyway, this book is awesome because when you talk about what your brain does and how everything associates everywhere and what chemical leads to what happened and what part leads to what trigger and what associates with what and when you start one of the reasons why I want people to become obsessed with themselves, not for the narcissistic way I'm vain and I'm great and I'm like oh my god, the best thing ever which you can become and you are, and you are like you are, but keep that one right. Right, but keep that one at. Like a five percent, right, like, give that one a five percent and then, like the other 95, I have a 10 limit because I can handle it like and I get, I have people in place that can put me where I need to and take away my five percent. Okay, we have leniency with Adela, but my 90 percent cannot be that at all. So it has to be very much trained, disciplined, committed and be part of this process of understanding myself.

Adela: 35:15

Not I'm so great, but allowing that obsession of becoming obsessed with how you work and how you function and becoming your own subject and becoming your own favorite person that you're. You're literally going well, today we did not do that, but you know what, adela, that's okay, because tomorrow we're gonna do it, because we're not gonna disappoint this. We're not, we're just not. That's not happening. Because here's why I would say this to Claire right, like I would have this conversation with Claire and be like okay, cool, claire, like we didn't do it today, but tomorrow, like you made a commitment, like you're going to hold yourself accountable, right, right, but having the ability to have that conversation with yourself and like that inner voice, how is that inner voice, has it become stronger for you? Like the Claire voice, not like the voices that we have, but the actual Claire conscious, like, hey, claire, we need to have a conversation.

Claire: 36:12

Yeah, it's that. I don't know if you'd call it the conscience voice. I don't know if it's a little one, but it's like your inner mom voice. You know, yeah, even though I'm not a mom, you know, I've played one, I've learned the mom voice a little bit, but I don't have a genuine mom voice. But I have that inner mom voice that's telling me to shape up. Sometimes, you know, and stick with it, it is certainly louder. Um, it's a lot more now yeah, because, well, it's needed.

Adela: 36:45

That's the part of, like our inner, the trauma is the inner child not understanding what's happening. And the world is moving so fast that we as human beings cannot process it at the speed that it's moving, like it's moving at the speed of life for our human experience, that it's meant to process. Like really technology, like research, the social development and just everything the expansion, the connection, the overload, like the we become. I as an empath, like I went to the cultural, the cultural council, greater jacksonville, um awards. I want to make sure I get that right. I hope I got that right, um, but uh, but I went to the awards. It was fantastic, right, and for the first time where I'm really sober of everything, like I don't, I'm not drinking, I'm not on medications, like I've been really for the last three years, but I've also been hiding away because I've been working on myself right From everything and going into it. That way I ended up walking away from as a human being, having a hangover from energy, like literally feeling hung over from just the level of energy that passes through you, right, and so what I've learned is alcohol, you know, and the other things that we take, drugs, whatever it is that we take, medicines, anything that we take that alters our state of being, that alters our natural experience, it prevents that from happening. So we're a little bit disconnected, right, so we can socialize a little bit better. We have this like, but when you're not there, the thing I learned like the hangover of, like energy hangover is intense and our bodies, like they're just doorways for these energies to pass and process through, and not understanding like that level of impact that it has, plus all the other things that we do, again our inner child starts to freak out and then we start to panic and then we start to lose it because that child does not know how to function in that state of experience and what we're as adults and I'm air quoting adults for this, if you're listening adults, um, because I wasn't an adult until like this year.

Adela: 38:53

For those of us adults and I'm 37 uh, we think we're adulting by showing up to places and clocking in at eight or five and doing our meetings right and making our pdf files. We think we're adulting. Adulting is none of that like, that's not it, that's not it. And and learning that that is a form of adulting that's done for the social construct of making sure there are machines and we can work and we do what we need to do, versus living a human experience that there's not an necessarily adulting stage.

Adela: 39:29

Once you pass, like your teen stage, into where you know your, your child, like, if you've been raised in the proper way, you, you should be developing like a flower and blooming into the stages of, like your natural life and growing right Like without the adulting stage, and I think that's part of where we're learning to process that Again, with you reaching your connection and coming into that with all of. It's so cool to see it because your inner Claire, she's going to be there for a while like there's a lot for her to have to work through and do that, but she's trusting you to guide her now right like. Don't you feel like, when you're not in a space of control sometimes, that you yourself today can like guide yourself? That feels so lost, like does that make sense?

Claire: 40:18

yeah, there's not that. There's not so much that underlying panics anymore. You know, even with just being out alone at another event, you know, there's normally that underlying anxiety and panic and I'm trusting myself more to just get over that or just deal with it or process it, you know. However, however, I want to and just do it rather than just fall into it. It's that, it's that trust fall moment, that, with that voice, I feel that with that voice, I feel, yeah, what have you learned?

Adela: 41:00

um, what was that turning point for you that you learned that you had that voice? Like do you remember, like, where you were? Like I hear Claire, like I remember hearing where I was, like I hear Adela, like I hear her, and I didn't understand it, but I heard, I remember that it just was very confusing for me, but it was a very good clarity, like a good, not a scary confusing, but like a good confusing.

Claire: 41:26

I am not sure, to be honest. I think it may be Because I've had a lot of, I've been doing a lot of events, but I've also had a lot of personal time, with the move that I did recently and all that, and when I sat myself down and made myself get back to like some of my artsy stuff, like I finally set up my painting stuff again. Like I didn't get painting but the first thing I did was start writing again and I feel like once I finished Dissonance for the first time before I edited it and Dissonance is my, my feature film, um, the first time I finished that, I felt like I took that big step on how society views emotion in general and how we are kind of starting to view how it affects it as people and us as humans, as individuals. It's both having that accomplishment and making that step into making myself sit down and finish it, because I kept procrastinating.

Claire: 42:55

Making that decision and accomplishing that kind of helped switch something in my brain in a way, or like flick that, flick that switch where it's like okay, you're, you're ready to, to, to take these bigger steps. You know you, you made yourself do this, you completed this, you got through. You know, know the things that were holding you back from doing it the move, the sleepless nights after the move, um, all the extra stressors, all the extra outside pressures. I'm just like starting to rhyme randomly a lot during this. Have you noticed that?

Adela: 43:33

but that's the part of you just don't know how much we start preaching and getting into the world of the word the word is just the powerful thing and when. But that's the part.

Claire: 43:40

You see it, you feel it, welcome, it's hilarious but it's really and and I've also and maybe this is part of this is I also like wrote my first original song as part of the film. It was gonna be a surprise for you, but I'll just say it right now. You'll read it and also oh my god y'all, y'all really quick she's an opera singer.

Adela: 44:02

She's an opera she's a phenomenal singer. Like she's a phenomenal singer. Like just fyi, that's like another, she's this. This little ball of talent is like really, anyway, that's just you wrote your own song it's.

Claire: 44:15

I never thought I could do that and because you know, it literally just came out of me. So by taking that step, you know stuff's just, it's like you said, it's the clear flower blossoming. So that that moment has just did a bunch of other decisions that I feel more confident I'm making.

Adela: 44:39

That is so awesome to hear. That is what that is. I can't wait. I can't wait, I'll get that NDA signed. I'll get that NDA signed. I will, I will, it's, it's it's listen again, procrastinated today, I'm not saying procrastinated. It's been a busy month and a half for me. I've been doing stuff. You know, I actually have to like be a fashion designer at some point in my life too, so like I was doing that this month too, and that took a lot of my time.

Claire: 45:05

Um, so I'm just saying everybody check out Adela's dress for the cultural council, or dress. It wasn't dress, it was like a like, it was a piece.

Adela: 45:14

So it was two. It was a two piece. No, it was a corset and a two piece. So it was a pant with a corset that I wanted it to look?

Adela: 45:20

I wanted it to look like one piece, but when you got close it had all the detail, all the different textures, because it was a future theme, right, and for me the future is about different textures, different, different things going together, and it doesn't matter that it may not match or may not, you wouldn't think of it. But like I had, you know, stripes and I had a whole like different thing, and then I had a red pleather and I had sequins. I love the red, right, it just like those little moments, right. So to me, the idea was, if that's the future, how can I create something that represents not only who I am and what I wanted? I want the color theme to be what you know, think and I am, which is reds and whites and golds and blacks and all that stuff, so like hello. But then I also wanted it to be like who I am as an artist, which is sparkly and fun and innovative, and I want those pieces and structure too, like because that was a structured piece. So when, again, when I design it's, I really am like crazy into that. So I have my brain is dead from having to switch 18 different things, but it's okay for the.

Adela: 46:31

That's the part where we talk about, like, just continue moving forward, even if you're not, like when we talk about catching up, right, you're never going to catch up. So stop moving forward. Even if you're not like when we talk about catching up, right, you're never going to catch up. So stop trying to catch up. Stop it. Stop trying to catch up. Keep moving forward one step at a time, small steps, one step at a time.

Adela: 46:48

And, before you know it, we're doing the podcast. Before you know it, she just wrote her first feature. Before you know it, she wrote a freaking old song, like are you kidding me? That's just that's a tidbit on that. Like so, but this is one of the things, again, one of the things that having you back and having you talk to you, talk with you about this, and sharing our story this way more they're really excited about is so that people know that we've been doing this and working on ourselves and our own form of therapy and again I use the word loosely therapy.

Adela: 47:19

We're not, we're not experts, none of that loosely exercises, whatever, um, but our own way of thinking, our own new way perspectives and our own new routines and our new own roadmaps, like looking at what's needed, then does that what's our want? And then what is required to get to that? Like, what bridge do we need to build that is solid, that will sustain us, to get that? And you did that for yourself. Again, we've done that, we've done the work, and I say you did that for yourself. Yes, I was there. Frank was there, we did that and we pushed you, we did that, but it wouldn't have again project human doesn't work, we don't work if you don't work. It's literally right like. Isn't that the motto from like the beginning self-reflection program.

Claire: 48:02

You know you got to put in the work for that. You can do it at your own pace if you need, but you can.

Adela: 48:11

As long as you put forth that initial effort and want to answer those questions and do it, then you will grow yeah, and seeing your growth, like I said, out of everybody that we've been working with, and as you guys get on more and we do more of these, you'll hear more. You'll get to hear more of my people, but you have been my as I call my prototype, the best, best. I have a couple of them, you guys, myself included, I'm included but it's really cool to see that the things that I know and believe in for myself, right, that I can tell you guys and show you a pathway, and all it requires is you taking it upon yourself to be like sure, I'll follow it, maybe I'll like it, maybe I won't, maybe it'll be easy, maybe it won't, maybe whatever, whatever. But the fact that you're gonna do it and then make it better for yourself like that's our whole motto about everything too is like make it better, make it better.

Adela: 49:08

If Claire has an idea and she's like Adela, I have an idea, here's the baseline, and you know the team's like well, we can add this and we can add this and we can add this, and she's like oh, that's better, okay, great, same thing it's. We're all like if we can do that and make it better, make the idea better, we only get better by ourselves. Right like we only get better as an individual, and then we're just able to help so many more people.

Claire: 49:33

Right like exactly I think I like, and that's why with, with having, you know, even me back for another one and more people back for another conversation, people can directly see how we're growing, even within that little bit. Like people will automatically be able to look at our last podcast episode still earlier, just season, and witness the growth of of you, of me, and and be like, okay, they're, they're doing this themselves. Yes, they have some outside help um, they have their, their support system, but they're also doing this themselves. So, and they've found that unique thing that makes it work. So I've found that unique thing that makes it work. So I can find that unique thing that makes it work. Or maybe I've found an idea from something and I'm hoping that, you know, by watching these, we can help inspire people like that.

Adela: 50:29

Yeah, exactly, and that's again. So that's why you guys have to join us, us, all of us, including Claire and the rest of our team. It's going to be at the end of. I'll announce the full date because I have to. I can't remember the date off the top of my head, uh, because my brain's fried. I'm gonna keep saying that that's a new t-shirt.

Adela: 50:45

My brain's fried, um, but I'll announce the official date and put them on there. But come join us on our live monthly continued conversation. It'll be the second one of the year. We're normally supposed to do monthly continues monthly get the name monthly but We've had other things to do and make things happen. So that's okay, because we've succeeded in a lot of the stuff that we've done. That doesn't mean that this is in any shape or form of failure. It just meant that it needs to be done at a different time. So that time is now. So a monthly continued conversation.

Adela: 51:18

Kickoff will be at the end of this month and we're going to invite you to talk to you about what's been happening in the organization. You'll get to meet the team and meet a few people who've helped in the last year really just organize the ideas, the thoughts, the programs. They'll give you their insights and inputs and that they've gone through the programs themselves. They're still going through the programs themselves, um, and they'll tell you what it's like working with me too. They'll be honest, don't worry, they're allowed to be honest, um, and so that will just. It'll be a fun time to come together again, get to know us, get to know what's going on with that, and then we are going to be introducing officially all right, making announcements, which we're slightly making it, but we've talked about our mental health summit.

Adela: 51:59

It is officially coming to fruition, so we're going to be announcing, uh, a few details of our uh creative project initiative at cpi, which is our mental health summit of 2026, and we'll need all the help we can get in the next coming year. So, please, please, please, please, please, follow and listen to this episode and all of our other stuff too, because again, those things are coming up and I'm really excited. Uh, yeah, claire, do you want to tell them just a little bit about how exciting it is? Like, how, like, like, I know I get excited you guys know me like, and I know I get excited. Like, right, adela gets excited, I do, and I get excited, but like we are doing it right, like we are doing it.

Claire: 52:44

It's it's gonna be this whole event and and everything, and it's actually we're gonna make it just a big, relevant event in in the community and really bring something that the community needs and and bring that awareness both to, like, the people who who need to to see it, who need to make some change, you know, and help us do that. So I'm really excited and just for all the different things that we're gonna have going on for the whole, oh, I'm so excited.

Adela: 53:15

So exciting so exciting.

Claire: 53:16

So it works for like what, like a year, a couple years now. So we've been part of a lot of this yeah, but I what?

Adela: 53:26

I think one of the things that the reason why we're able to bring it to fruition is because our role like we have an unspoken rule is that again and we say it project human and the ideas and these things cannot work if we don't work, if we, as the individual within and do not have a solid foundation, are able to handle the things that we're trying to take on and do. And a lot of this that we're teaching, again from within the organization, from within who we are, is we're teaching how to be a sustainable self-being, how to be a strong, independent foundation for yourself. That way, you are able to be a pillar for society, you are able to be a pillar for your community, your friend, your support and all of that. So, coming up, we have been able to forge a small foundation and we are some of the small pillars that have been able to learn how to sustain ourselves, how to be able to manage and lead. So we're going to be asking for you to come on board also be part of that. So this big thing that we want to do is bigger than any of the other projects we've ever done at scale that I again I am.

Adela: 54:27

I am afraid, but not afraid in a way that, like I don't want to do it. I'm afraid in a way that I want to do it so much i'm'm going to screw it up, afraid, right, like I'm going to screw it up so much. But, as Claire said, we've talked about it over these last couple years. I know that this is the right thing and I know this is also the right time for us to push for it. The conversation is there, the need is there and the community wants involvement, like they want to be involved. I know you want to be involved and so at least that's what you're telling me, and if you're telling me wrong things, then like you need to come have a one-on-one because I'm relaying your message. You said yes and I said yes and let's go. So that's the part and um. So I'm really really excited about that. So, again, just make sure you join us and make sure that you uh sign up, follow, go to to our website wwwphing-ingorg thinkingorg. It's a new way to think. Check out the information, download a few of the guides that we have. Going on, we'll be having a lot more towards next year and if you're interested in volunteering and becoming part of that and all of that. Reach out to me or reach out to Claire She'll, and then we'll get you the information that you need.

Adela: 55:43

Yes, you will have to take the Reflection Program. Yes, you will have to go through what we do. Yes, you will not like it, but I'm saying this now. You won't like it because it'll face but you won't like it because it'll make you face a lot of your truths and that. But you won't like it because it'll make you face a lot of your truths and that's the whole part of what you're. When you're coming with me, coming with Project Human, we're making you face your truths because we know that you're more powerful than what you fear. We know that you're way more worth than what you think, that you are where you're at and we just want to give you that push by having a stable foundation for you.

Adela: 56:12

And, like Claire said, we have a community. We're building a community of humans who are there for each other. This does not mean we're there every day, all day long. It means when there is that 911 and I need help processing, I need help understanding, I need help just being seen as me in that space. That's who we are and it could be for a listen. It could be to talk you through something, it could be to give you advice. It could be to give you resources. It could be to give you advice, it could be to give you resources. It could be whatever. We have that as a support that we're working on and that's what project human is working on building through this. So we appreciate you supporting us and loving us on that too.

Adela: 56:46

So again, mcc, our monthly continued conversation starts at the end of this month, and then we'll have one one more at the in november. We'll take, in december, off for the holidays and then, come january, we'll be opening up that to everybody to join on that conversation, because it's time to kick off 2025 and actually do some good work right, make it make it happen Enough with all of us talking, including me. So, claire, thank you for coming back on. I really appreciate it. Uh, take a second and just tell everybody really quick uh, anything, what do you? Whatever you want, it's whatever of course.

Claire: 57:27

Thank you so much for having me again. It was great doing this little impromptu follow-up. I it was. I can't wait to see what, or, or hear, see, read what people think. Hopefully we're starting some more conversations that are, you know, real important, and if anybody wants to reach me, I am at wwwclairlouisehutercom. So there you go.

Adela: 57:56

I love it Awesome. So, like we said, follow us, love us, support us, all the other stuff, other stuff. We appreciate you and thank you for doing this impromptu with me. And again, please, everybody, stay safe during this hurricane. Uh, it is tuesday, october 8th. We are still in our early stages, but I know that some of you are feeling it. So, please, please, please, be safe. We love you, we support you and we're sending our prayers and until next time, have a great one, my friends.